It's about time, Gabe!

"It's about time." I can hear my friend's voice in my head now. She's been a 'fan' of mine for a long time now. She never turns down a performance from me. Why are those words ringing in my head? Because I didn't accept my gift until now. Last night I performed on stage. I felt no pretentiousness or false humility. Last night was the night it finally hit me--I'm supposed to be there. The stage is my home. The moment I walked off of it, and the accolades died, I became just another person. I wandered through the crowd of people listening to the few remaining acts of the night, making small conversation here and there, but nothing as profound and transformative as being up there, spittin' wisdom to the people. I feel like I can't communicate the depths of my being through everyday conversation; it has to be through my artform. 'What you put out is what you get back.' 'Follow your passion, Zuko, and life will reward you.'  'Think happy thoughts.' 'Do your Dharma.' 'Do what makes you come alive.' All these quotes just came to me now. If what I put out is what I get back, then let me put passion out there! I love experiencing passion in myself and others! I love it when I get excited about something, and someone joins me on it! Pure power! Of course, I may not always feel passion. I'm starting to come onto an important way to tap into my passion at all times--USE YOUR GIFT. ~sigh~ And then comes the part where I know I have to transcend my laziness. Chronic laziness yields boring life--no passion. Man it's so clear  now. I used to blame the lack of passion on others, but the truth was, they were passionate about their own things, and I wasn't paying attention to me! Dang dude! Music is not an easy thing to do, however. I didn't perform for a long time because there was so much I wanted to do with my music that I didn't think was possible. Transcending my belief systems had to become top priority. Now I am honest about my intentions, with no fear of sliding back, because my fate depends on me and the Almighty. Nothing can stop 'us'. The stage is where I'm supposed to be. My friends are the mic and guitar. My lovers are the notes and rhythms. My family is the crowd. There's something about the realization of God putting you where you're supposed to be--you honor it, and keep doin' that shi*. I don't want to be wandering through life with no purpose or understanding. It may take me some time, but I'll come to accept it eventually. MUSIC IS MY CALLING, MY ALARM TO WAKE ME UP OUT OF THE TRANCE OF MEDIOCRITY AND A LACK-OF-PASSION LIFE. I just have to believe in myself, believe in God, and really assign no reason to my path of music other than it is what He made me to do. Period. YOU DON'T LIKE IT, TOO BAD--but I think you will (*wink*). Excelsior, G.A.B.E.